Archive for the ‘Talib’s Story’ Category

Dear Friends,
This past week we have seen some major strides. In just under 2 weeks, we have surpassed our first $1,000 in our fundraising campaign! We have also had our voices heard on this week’s WPFW Crossroad’s show with Roach Brown, and at the Enough is Enough protest at the U.S. Parole Commission office. Talib and I are grateful to all the people who have been supportive in helping us to navigate this difficult climate, find ways to plug in and speak up, and come closer to achieving Talib’s freedom. Your support – logistically, emotionally, financially, and so on – means a great deal and helps counter the isolation and struggle of fighting this fight. Thank you all!!!

Support our Drive: https://www.generosity.com/fundraising/talib-m-shakir-legal-defense-fund–2/

Currently there are about 2.3 million people incarcerated in American prisons. That number includes state, federal and local jails. Of that number there are approximately 2,230 people serving life sentences from crimes committed as juveniles. The current debate among politicians is criminal justice reform. As it concerns juvenile lifers the question, around reform, is how much time is enough time.

How much time is enough time for someone to serve in prison for an offense committed before the human brain is fully developed? A National Institute of Health study proposes that the part of the brain that restrains risky behavior. and thinking skills is not fully developed until the age of 25. Jay Giedd, the psychiatrist leading the study, told MSNBC earlier this year that this finding came as a surprise to him because he used to think that the brain was fully developed at the age of 18. In all fairness to Dr. Giedd most people have the same opinion, including judges, prosecutors, lawyers, and other critical figures involved in the criminal justice process.

This issue is such a hot topic that Newt Gingrich urged Governor Jerry Brown to sign California’s Senate Bill 9, “The Fair Sentencing for Youth Act”, which authorizes resentencing opportunities for juveniles sentenced to life imprisonment. Mr. Gingrich in an op-ed piece written with Pat Nolan quoted,

“We did some dumb things as teenagers that might have caused a lot of harm. You probably did, too. Gratefully, we didn’t harm anyone too badly, but we cringe about how clueless we were about the possible consequences to what we did. Teenagers often don’t make very good decisions. Our laws take this into account in many ways. We don’t let young people drink until they are 21, and they cannot sign contracts, vote or serve on juries until they are 18. But there is one area in which we ignore teens, youth and impulsiveness: our criminal laws. Our laws often ignore the difference between adult and teens. and some youngsters are sentenced to life in prison. Should those youngsters remain in prison for something they did when they were so young? Wouldn’t it be better to re-evaluate them after serving a long stretch in prison and consider whether they have matured and improved themselves?”

In October 1993, at the age of 17, I committed an offense I deeply regret. I was involved in a crime where someone lost their life. An act committed under the influence of alcohol. An act not intended, nor excusable, and deeply regretted. As a result I was charged, tried, convicted, and sentenced as an adult. I was given a sentence of 20 years to life. Due to the seriousness of the offense I was fully aware that I was going away to prison for a very long time. I made a bad choice and justice had to be served. As of now I have been incarcerated for 23 years, three years longer than the twenty years the judge sentenced me to. How did this happen may be the question you are asking. I will get to that shortly.

When I first arrived at the state prison I immediately began working towards seeking knowledge. I knew that education was going to be the thing that would help me get through this sentence. I had, and have, a thirst for knowledge and love the process of seeking it. After I obtained my GED I began the UDC prison college program. It was my goal to graduate with a BA in Urban Studies. (The current national average recidivism rate is 0.4% for those that are released with at least an AA degree; however, it is 70%, at the national level for those released without sufficient education.)  Unfortunately, the program was cut and I was not able to complete my studies. That did not stop me from pursuing other educational goals.

Here is a list of some of my achievements over the last 23 years:

GED
UDC (college program)
Georgetown University (college program)
I am a certified and Licensed Barber
I am a certified instructor of basic English
I completed the BOP’s Life Connection Program, an 18 month, 1588, therapeutic residential community program
I have completed several drug courses, anger management and family courses
I learned (self taught) fluent Spanish and Arabic. My job for many years has been teaching Spanish GED and ESL
I have taken computers, Microsoft Office classes, and I am computer literate
I and a certified teachers aide. Through the Department of Labor I completed a 4000 hour course that allows me to serve as a teachers aide
I have taken building trades that required over 500 hours to complete. Also Residential Construction Electrical Principals that required 300 hours to complete
I have been the lead facilitator for several programs: Thinking for a Change, Quality of Life, Victim impact (taught in conjunction with Dr. Tony Gaskew, Professor of Criminal Justice at the University of Pittsburgh). My favorite course was Concerned Offenders for Youth Awareness (COYA). COYA was a program where I worked with at-risk youth through the Maricopa County Youth Probation Department, in Phoenix Az. They were brought inside the prison were we were able to mentor them.
I have certification as a Drug and Alcohol Abuse technician
I have recently completed two major courses. One as a Peer Recovery Advocate, someone who works with mental health patients that may struggle with drug and alcohol abuse. The other course I completed through Adams State College is Victim Advocacy. Learning these skill allow me to work with victims of crimes and other abuse.

Most importantly, I have skills and training as a certified wellness and personal development Life Coach. It was a goal of mine to bring the concept of Life Coaching to a prison I was in. I was able to do that through a program sponsored by the Institute for Life Coach Training founded by Dr.Patrick Williams, who also became my coach mentor, friend and advocate. This program, in FCI McKean, has graduated over 90 inmates. Inmates who, upon release, can seek employment, or further their coaching skills. To list the recommendations I have would take up a lot of space and time. But, those people include Senators, an ex-Captain of the KCPD, Chaplains, College Professors, Wardens, and the list goes on.

In 2010 I had an initial parole hearing. At that hearing I was parole eligible but due to the nature of the offense I was recommended a 1 year set of until my next hearing. The final decision comes from the US Parole Commissioners. They set me off for 3 years. In 2013 I had a rehearing and was recommended parole. The USPC Commissioners sent back a decision to set me off 5 more years. Yes, I was given more time the second time at the second hearing while it was noted I was a better candidate for parole at the re-hearing. At the second hearing my staff representative was the Associate Warden of Programs. Not to mention the employment opportunities I had available, housing, community ties and support, along with money saved. But here I sit.

Why am I explaining all of this? Because as my family and I try to raise $20,000 for an attorney to represent me against the parole board. I need your help. I feel that if I am going to ask for you help and support that you know exactly what and who you are supporting. I want you to feel that your donations are being contributed to a worthy cause.

What is the cause? Yes, it has to do with me but it also address a bigger issue, and answers the big question. How much time is a enough time for a person who committed their offense as a juvenile to serve? How much rehabilitation is needed to prove to the parole board that a person is ready for society.

I need this lawyer because she is going to help gather other experts to show that I am not the same 17 year old kid I was 23 years ago. The board’s reason to deny me parole; I have the same propensity to commit crime, and that I am a danger to public safety, based on my behavior at the age of 17.  Regardless of what I have achieved during my incarceration, my record of the last 23 years of my adult life. Despite the fact that experts have determined that most people outgrow crime around the ages of 35 and 40. What I have presented to them is not enough so I have to go the extra mile. I need your help to get there.

After reading this piece. What do you think? Do you think 23 years is enough time to serve for an offense committed at a time when the brain is not fully developed. Do you think, that after reading some of my achievements during my incarceration show, I am ready to return to society and be productive? If you do please donate to this cause.

Donate whatever you can. Post this story and pass it on to your friends, family and colleagues. Your donations and generosity will not go unnoticed and will be appreciated. I am ready for society. I am ready to be productive and live life as a productive upstanding and law-abiding citizen. I need your help to make that happen. So please help by donating, any which way you can. All you have to do is go to this link, Talib M. Shakir Legal Defense Fund, and make that donations. You will not regret it.

Thank for your help and participation!
Talib Shakir

Dear Friends & Family,
I’m reaching out to ask for your support for our legal fee fundraiser: “Talib M. Shakir Legal Defense Fund.”  As many of you know, Talib was unjustly denied parole in 2013, despite being more than qualified and having a recommendation for release (read more about his 2013 parole hearing.  Your donations will help us hire our highly esteemed lawyer, Attorney Linda Sheffield, to fight for Talib’s release.  We have been fighting  this decision for a long time, and have now found an accomplished lawyer with a strategy designed to win.  Your support means making the dream of bringing Talib home a reality.
with peace,
Sakeenah

Dear followers and friends,

We thank you for your dedication in staying updated with Talib’s blog and story.  Right now our family is readying to attend a quarterly meeting of the U.S. Parole Commission.  At this upcoming meeting we plan to raise our concerns about Talib’s case, his recent denial of parole and set off of 5 years.  In anticipation of this important meeting, we have been gathering our resources, pulling together letters and people who plan to attend by our side to voice their support for Talib.  You too can play a role and help Talib’s voice be heard and our concerns listened to.  Sign our petition to show your support for the U.S. Parole Commission to reconsider their denial of parole to Talib M. shakir.

Here are the details:

http://www.change.org/petitions/u-s-parole-commission-reconsider-the-recent-parole-decision-for-talib-m-shakir

Here’s why it’s important:

We, the undersigned, call on Mr. Isaac Fulwood, Jr., Chairman, U.S. Parole Commission to reconsider Talib Mustafa Shakir for immediate parole. Talib has grown from a confused, misguided youth into a focused, mature adult. He has been a positive influence among those around him, as was displayed in the show of support by the deputy warden, and we are confident that he will continue to display this outstanding character upon release into society.

Talib M. Shakir has served 20 years in federal prison for an unfortunate crime he committed at the young age of 17.  Having immediate remorse for this crime, Talib has been on a path to change his life around for the better ever since.  He has made remarkable achievements while incarcerated, including receiving his G.E.D., barber’s liscense, physical training liscense, and making strides toward a Masters Certificate in Life Coaching.  He has enrolled in numerous college courses as well as facilitated several Victim Impact courses and workshops.  His role as a mentor and life coach has touched the lives of countless youth, inmates, and ex-offenders, many who now lead successful lives on the outside.

We who await Talib’s release from prison have felt firsthand his personal contributions to society and ability to improve lives.  We recognize his high potential for full rehabilitation and fully support his chance at release on parole.  We know and trust that his skills, dedication, and compassion will lead him to continue his positive work here on the outside, where he can be surrounded and supported by his family and friends who miss him dearly.

We ask the U.S. Parole Commission to reconsider their denial of parole atTalib’s July, 2013 parole hearing.  We ask them to go with the recommendation of the hearing examiner, who recommended him for a release date of March, 2014.

You can sign our petition by clicking here.

Thank you for your support!

The family and loved ones of Talib

August 7, 2013 was one of the most disappointing days of my life, as I was denied parole for the second time.  Not only was I denied parole but I was given a harsher set off than I was given the first time that I saw the parole board. The first time I was given a 36 month set off, three years, and this time I was given a 60 month set off, 5 years.  Which is crazy considering what I have going for me in terms of support.

I went to the parole board with the Associate Warden as my staff representative. For those of you who don’t understand what that means let me tell you. That is the second highest Executive Official in the Prison, second to the Warden. That person has to have the approval of the Warden of the institution to be present.  So in essence that person was there to represent me with the approval of the Warden.  So that is like the ultimate staff support that a person can get.  This person spoke of all of the things that I have done here in terms of teaching and facilitating classes.  Classes such as Victim Impact which is a very important class and course for violent offenders.  This person stated that based upon my behavior and actions within the prison that it was clear that I would be productive in society.

I showed the board that I was a good candidate for parole as I demonstrated and proved that I had covered all of the risk factors that are associated with recidivism.  I showed and proved that I (1) had strong family support, ties and a place to live, (2) that i had all of the necessary paperwork needed to get a valid identification, birth certificates and social security card, (3) I had a job lined up waiting and had been in contact with other organizations to come and do volunteer work that may have lead to gainful employment with them, and (4) I have done a substantial amount of time incarcerated with no infractions nor new/continual criminal conduct.

The time between my first parole hearing three years ago and the hearing this June, 2013, I went outside the institution and sought education.  Education that I personally paid for.  Education that is not even provided in the institution.  So that showed my continual achievement of programs.

It is not often that a person comes before them with the support, plans and goals that I have.  It is not often that a person who came to prison as a child makes the mature adult changes and choices that I have made.  It is not often that one comes to a parole hearing with the highest of the executive staff speaking on their behalf.  It is not often that a person comes to the parole board with a genuine and reputable mentor who has invested time and energy towards the success of that person to be denied parole.  Not only denied parole but given a harsher penalty than the first time.

If I am not a prime candidate to make parole my question is who is? I was referred to as model prisoner by one of the staff members.  It makes no sense and everyone is stunned by the decision.  It has even affected the way that the other inmates see the possibilities that exist in their lives. I was like the beacon of hope and motivation for these guys and the way that they see it if I can’t make parole how can they.

The reason that they used to deny parole is that due to the nature of my offense, there is a high probability that I will not obey the laws of society.  That reason is in total contradiction to what I have done in the last 20 years and what I am doing now.  I have been a big advocate for victims and have taught those classes.  I have also done other work that has been shown to improve the well being of others and have fostered good relations between the men and their families and communities.  So even from here I have been active in being pro-social.  How is it that I could not do it out there with more resources at my disposal?

Not to minimize my offense, but for those of you who may be wondering.  I have a regular street crime as my charge.  That means that there are no extraordinary elements to my crime.  It didn’t involve women, children or elderly people.  Nothing that would warrant what has happened to me in regards to the set off that I received.  Furthermore I was 17 when this offense was committed.  I am being punished as if I was fully aware of the penalty and repercussions of my behavior at the time . Not to justify my actions, but it is relevant. 

To be fair to all I will just briefly recap the events of my offense.  A guy was killed in a failed robbery attempt. The ironic thing is that I made this poor decision trying to get to a better place.  A place that offered support that was needed for me to be successful.  At the time I didn’t have the means to pay for the travel expense and in a desperate and foolish attempt to get the money needed I borrowed a gun and bought a 5th of gin to calm my nerves.  For some reason I thought that I could just do a harmless stick up.  In my mind I never thought that anyone would buck up against a gun.  When I went into this place there was a clerk sitting on the freezer who, I didn’t know at the time, spoke no English.  So when I ask for him to lay down he jumped up and I panicked and fired the gun.  He was about 15 feet from where I was at.

One thing that came out in trial was that there was no way that I intended to shoot the guy due to the gunshot wound.  He was shot in the neck which was consistent to the motion of him standing up. I had the gun aimed over his head and when he stood he became lined up with the gun.  Had I intended to shoot and kill him he would have been shot in the body area as the gun would have been pointed at his head and his upward movement would have changed the target of the gun.  Due to that evidence I was convicted of 2nd degree murder. The board is judging me and making decisions as if I intentionally went in here to kill this person during the robbery. They are making independent decisions despite trial testimonies and legal decisions that were made in my case.  I never denied the offense.  When I was captured I confessed and expressed regret for that act.  That is not what hardcore criminals do.  That is not what people who intentionally kill people do.  The judge in my case recognized these elements and sentenced me based on those mitigating factors.

What I did was reckless and careless, and I have done my time for that act and have done the best that I could to offset that act while incarcerated.  So, at what point am I allowed to redeem myself and repay my debt to society by entering back into society?  I can’t do it from in here.

In fact to demonstrate how punitive this measure is, usually when the board denies someone parole it is to give that person enough time to get a needed program of evaluation.  So they say, we are gong to deny you parole for 2 years so that will give you enough time to get a GED.” So they tell the person what is needed to make parole.  In my case because I have already done everything, they set me off and cannot even recommend that I take a program or get an evaluation during the time of the set off.  So it becomes clear that they want to be punitive by punishing me with out even telling me what is needed of me to make parole. That is because I have done it all. There is not another program in the BOP that I can do, I have literally done them all.  This suggests that they do not believe in their own system of rehabilitation.  If they did they would give me the parole that I have worked hard for.

How is it that a child, literally, is punished as an adult and serves his time as an adult and conforms to all of the rules and regulations, goes above and beyond what is necessary and achieves high recognition to not be given a second chance at a time in his life where he is less likely to recidivate, according to statically findings. What logic and reason is used to make that decision?

I am making a plea to all of those that follow me on this site to aid me in fighting this decision. To call to attention the system that is in place and demand answers from the people that make these decisions.  What criteria is being used when deciding these cases?   Why has my case been denied parole, and what exactly is expected of me to achieve it?

I am reaching out to those advocates of juvenile justice, penal justice and human rights, as well as concerned members of society to seek justice and answers.  At a time where this country is in difficult and challenging economical strains, does it make economical sense to spend $40,000 for the next 5 years, totaling $200,000, for my continued incarceration?  A person that has clearly rehabilitated? This in itself should cause one to be concerned.  I am not the only one.  If there are five of us, which there are, that is 1 million dollars spent.  There are approximately 2.3 million people locked up in the U.S., and if there are just 5,000 people being treated the way that I am being treated?  The math speaks for itself.

This is a time where some of America’s most conservative leaders have spoken out about the issues regarding teen offenders.   Newt Gingrich has openly opposed the way that juvenile offenders are treated and dealt with in the system.  In an op-ed with Pat Nolan he says, “We did some pretty stupid things as teenagers that might have caused a lot of harm. You probably did, too. Fortunately, we didn’t hurt anyone badly, but we cringe now at how clueless we were about the possible consequences of what we did.”

Teenagers don’t often make very good decisions. Our laws take this into account in many ways:  we don’t let them drink until they are 21, and they can’t sign contracts, vote or serve on juries until they are 18.  But there is one area in which we ignore teens’ youthfullness and impulsiveness:  our criminal laws.  The application of our laws often ignores the differences between adults and teens, and some youngsters are sentenced to life in prison without parole.  Despite urban legends to the contrary, this law has no exceptions:  A teen sentenced to life without parole will die in prison as an old man or woman.  No exceptions for good behavior, no exceptions period.  No hope.

You might expect that these LWOP sentences are limited to the “worst of the worst,” but that is not the case.  A young teen can be a bit player in a crime, e.g., act as a lookout while his buddies go in to steal beer from the convenience store…About 45 percent of the inmates serving LWOP for teenage crime were not the person who caused the death.  Yet they will die in prison of old age, with no chance for release.  But should these youngsters die in prison for something they did when they were so young?  Would it not be better to re-evaluate them after having served a long stretch in prison to consider whether they have matured and improved themselves?

“We are conservative Republicans, and we believe that some people are so dangerous that we must separate them from our communities. That is what prisons are for.  But sometimes we overuse our institutions.  California’s teen LWOP [law] is an overuse of incarceration.  It denies the reality that young people often change for the better.  And it denies hope to those sentenced under it.  Of course, not every young person going through the system turns his or her life around.  But would not it be better to at least consider whether these inmates have matured and improved themselves after a long prison stretch?” (As quoted by Newt Gingrich)

So in light of this what does this say about a person such as myself who has demonstrated that I have matured and changed my life for the better?  Where is the justice in that.  I think someone needs to call Newt and ask him about my situation.  Like hey Newt here is the perfect example that what you consider to be appropriate in terms of release for juvenile offenders of violent offense that have served a long stretch.  Why can’t I get out and I don’t even have life without parole?  I have life with parole. So if a person who has demonstrated this with a parolable sentence can not make parole how is a teen with a LWOP going to ever be given a second chance?  Makes you think and wonder.

I am appealing to those interested parties to send this out to your colleagues, families and friends, teachers, professors, advocates, law centers whoever may find interest in this to join me in finding out solid answers.  Answers that are needed that will hopefully help free me from prison,  sooner rather than later.  One this that has been proven is that longer sentences create a loss of ties with the family and community. How is it that at the time where I would be the most productive I could be denied the chance to go out and be productive?  Is it that they are holding my age against me? I am 37 now and will be 42 if I have to do this whole 5 years. What if they decide to set me off again 5 more years? Now I would be 47. What productive years do i have left in me? I just become a product of another system that tax the American public because now I become too old to compete in the work force. That is the system of welfare and subsidized ex-offender government programs.

Pass the word and get this message out. It is what this site is about, A voice from the inside. This is a voice that needs to be heard. This is a call to action to see that this voice gets heard and to challenge those powers that are trying to suppress it. Please send this and link this message to you loved ones, friends and colleagues. I want as many people to know of this and hopefully stand in support of me as I fight it. It is important that you sign up as followers so that you get the updates as they come.

My plan is to formulate a letter that can be used by all to send to the parole commissioner asking for a reconsideration and a reopening of my case. The more support that I have the louder the voice becomes. If you know of anyone that has access to any type of media outlet, contact them about this story.  Whether it is through another blog site, the associated press, or NPR, and so on.

In closing I want to say thank you all for you support and I hope that this message is heart felt and taken into consideration by all.  I will be sending out another letter along with the address to write to.  If there are any specific questions that you have for me that may help you come to a decision please feel free to voice them, no matter what they are.

Thanks all

Free Prisoner

It has been a while since I have written anything and I just want to share the reasons why. It has been a long time coming now and I am now about to go back up for parole, next week hopefully. I have been asked many times about how do I feel about being this close to home, if I make parole. It is hard to really say what I am feeling right now. I can describe how it was the first time that I went before the board.

When I went up the last time I was told that I was parole eligible and asked if I had an address to use in the event that I make parole. I was left speechless and it took me a minute to think of the address that I would use. Well, I didn’t make parole and was given another three years to do, what I am finishing up on now.

It was a surreal feeling when I was told that I would be recommended parole just as it was a surreal feeling when I was denied and told to do three more years. Now, I know that you may be thinking, “what is three more years after you have done so much time now?” Well, it is not the time, amount of time, it is the mindset that one has to go through in order to do the time.

I believe that there is a lot of institutional behaviors, thoughts and habits that one must shed before going home. Behaviors, thoughts and habits that are needed to survive within prison.

What roles am I talking about? Well, there are many roles that one has to play and I will try to give you some examples. One thing that seems to be noticeable is how possessive guys can be. Not only are they possessive they will take your life for some of these possessions. Things such as small as a spot on the floor. There are five TV’ s on the unit and the units are open so that means that it is like being in a crowded room all the time. They give us plastic chairs and guys come out in the morning and put there chairs in what is “their” spots on the floor. To move a guys chair is disrespectful and one will get hurt for this type of disrespect.

To move a guys shower stuff that is hanging on the shower door is a act of disrespect and one will get hurt about that. Another thing is that one often has to go to the showers in tennis shoes or boots, in the event that something breaks out. One has to be ready at all times for what ever may happen. Or what about not being able to take a nap during the day while the cell doors are unlocked. Or having to defecate with one leg out of ones pants. To get caught using that bathroom with both legs in your pants can cost you your life. It is hard to defend yourself when you are sitting on the toilet so you have to make sure that your legs don’t get tied up in your pants.

There are many roles that one has to take on in order to survive in here so to be told that I may be going home I felt that I needed to shed those roles and step into the role of being a law abiding citizen. A person who don’t get crazy stares for walking around in slippers. A person who don’t have to walk by a dying person and act as if nothing is going on. I think that has to have been one of the hardest things to adapt to. To see a guy getting stabbed to death and to have to walk away while hearing the screams and pleas of a dying man. To wake up everyday and to see the bloodstains from the events that have taken place over the years. It use to be hard to sleep at night when I was in Lorton. Lorton was open dormitory and there was always action going on. When the dorm lights went out the predators came out.

Well those are the skill that I didn’t want to take back to the free world with me so when I went to see the parole board the first time I thought that I was done with having to deal with all of the stuff that one has to deal with in prison. When I was denied parole I was stuck in between two worlds and it was hard to readjust to having to do three more years. That was the hardest part of that process. It was like day one all over again.

So this time around I think that I am hopefully but that is about it. I mean I would love to make parole and come home but the reality is that until I am actually released I have to stay focused on doing time. This is a tragedy for those guys that can’t get out of these roles, easily. They take the prison mentality home with them and the prison mentality is criminal therefore it is easy to result back to crime. That is the state that many find themselves in when they can’t switch roles.

I think that I will be alright as long as I can tell the difference and keep in my head that it is just a phase and that one day it will pass.

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Today I was asked a question by a younger inmate about patience and tolerance. After talking to him I felt compelled to write something about that and what it means to me. The conversation that I had with this young guy was one that I needed as I have been thinking a lot about the things that I am doing here in terms of programs. At times it is as if some of these guys don’t get it and I understand that, yet it is still sad to witness it.

The other day an old friend of mine, who is a violator and left me to go home a few years ago, came back into the system. The last time that I saw him he was fighting for his life. He had gotten stabbed over a pair of shoes. I would walk and talk to him about the choices and decisions that he was making and he would feign interest. I used to tell him that the things that he was getting into didn’t lead any where and that the guys that he was befriending were no good. Well it took him to almost lose his life to get the point yet that wasn’t enough to stop him from going out and getting back involved in the streets. Therefore he is back here.

When I first saw him we talked for a few before he told me of the after effects of that day, the day that he was stabbed. While he was being cuffed to be taken to medical…(pause here) he was stabbed and bleeding yet he was cuffed behind his back and made to walk to the medical building wth!!…he started to get short winded. What he didn’t know was that his lung was punctured. When he got to medical he was vomiting blood and they had to start cutting him on the spot to put a tube in him to drain the blood. By the time that he got to the hospital he was unconscious and when he woke up he was without one lung.

What does this have to do with the conversation that I had today? A lot. Lately I have been asking myself what does all of this stuff mean. I mean here is guy that lost a lung and almost his life. A guy that knew right from wrong and had the right people in his ear to help guide him yet that wasn’t enough. Last week a bus of inmates arrived here. There were 26 on this bus and out of the 26 guys there were 16 violators. Over half of them are repeat offenders. That is a sad thing when one thinks about it. So when this young kid came to me and asks me, “Talib, teach me something right now,” the only thing that I could come up with is patience.

What i explained to him was that patience is obtained through hardship, trials and tribulations. When we can learn to not look at the “challenges” of life but to look for the lessons that come through the hardships, trials and tribulations, we will truly understand what it means to be patient. Patience doesn’t come without a price yet it is one of the most rewarding things to have acquired in this journey called life. Patience is the thing that is between a good and a bad decision, the thing that sits on top of the prisons walls. When one becomes impatient to the trials of life outside these walls it becomes easy to make choices that lead back to the penitentiary. This is what i explained to this young guy tonight. The importance of patience. Through that conversation it was if I was talking to myself as i needed to hear the same thing. Whether one gets it or not is not the main issue as I still must be patient in what I do, helping others.

Had it not been for this conversation today I may not have heard what I need to hear to move ahead in life. That it is going to be important for me to be patient and tolerant as I face the challenges of a new world come this summer. A world that I left a teenager and am coming back to as a man. I am going to have to be patient with myself and ask those around me to be patient with me. I am going to have to be tolerant of others as I ask them to be tolerant of me. This is part of what it takes to survive out there in society, especially after 20 years of incarceration. So the lesson today for me is to find patience even in what seems to be the most hopeless and difficult situations in life. That it a jewel!